Saturday, September 6, 2008

This is Walter Reed, Senator McCain


During his nomination speech, the crack team of Crony, Buddy, & "Oh my GAWD, you're not COLORED, are you?", threw up a slide of Walter Reed on the Green Screen behind the world's oldest nominee.

Only one problem.

It was Walter Reed MIDDLE SCHOOL.

In California.

Over 4,000 freaking miles from Walter Reed ARMY MEDICAL CENTER.

The one in Washington D.C., that does such brilliant work on post-blast patients after they've been processed through Germany.

They're not too shabby with the eye care either. They did surgery on me at age 17, a buck private in the U.S. Army, still in AIT, trying to fix my left eye which had been slashed into a zillion fucking pieces in a fight at 13. Did a good job too; made it possible for me to have enough depth perception I could go on flight status, even if I still couldn't see worth a frack... but they let more LIGHT in and cleaned out a whole shitload of scar tissue. It was really state-of-the-art work for what was possible back in winter 77, just months before I turned 18.

Walter Reed has always been a world-class hospital, even though all this commotion about shitty quarters is nothing new. Hell, they stuck me in shitty quarters while I was recovering from surgery back in 78. I ate spam on crackers -- no lie; I remember, after all these years. I went and bought them myself. It was better than the shit they were feeding me, plus, I could eat all I wanted, whenever I wanted instead of waiting for some overworked orderly for whom I was absolutely the lowest of the lowest priority, to bring me shit on a shingle.

Spam on Triscuit (Nabisco) crackers. Delish. Listened to my music on a mini-boom-box in this remote barracks for an entire weekend, cockroaches and all.

The cockroaches liked the Spam and Triscuits. I remember how congealed the Spam was when you finally got the damn thing open, turning the heavy key around and around and around the outside till finally it had a metal strip all wrapped around the key with Spam and congealed processed meat juices dripping down. So that's where I stayed all weekend. With a great big patch over my left eye. (That's back when both eyes were still the same color. Now of course if you look closely, you'll see my eyes are two different colors, since the transplant back in 2000.) After a week on the ophthalmology ward I was SO glad to get the hell out of there I didn't give a shit about the roaches; they were my new best friends. I just lay there in that barely heated barracks all weekend, wrapped in all the clothes I had with me (barely any; fucking Army), listening to my music, reading books, and jerking off.

Come Monday it was a bus back to WRAMC main buildings. They took the eye patch off, told me not to scratch it or I'd tear the stitches out and ruin their work and that would piss them off and I didn't want to piss them off, did I? (Plus, I'd go blind, they said. Yeah. Like that had ever stopped me before. The real threat was these OFFICERS would be mad at me. *shudders* I was a 17 year old kid. What the fuck did I know. Looking back at it there were probably 26-27 year old 3-4 year Ophthalmo residents. *laughs* I think they were only Captains. Captains! *cracks up* At the time though, that was like Gods from on high.)

Then they gave me three weeks of convalescent leave. I hopped a flight to Tucson and surprised the hell out of my Mom. BIG improvement in my vision. GOOD doctors (even if they scared a poor buck private.)

Walter Reed is the best.

If John "FUCK THE VETERANS" McCain had ever even bothered to haul his Senatorial ass over to WRAMC to, oh, I don't know, hell, even tell the troops recovering from having their legs and arms and eyes and nuts blown off and brains scrambled that he too, the mighty John McCain, had been a POW and knew a thing or too about getting through hard times, well, I might have something good to say about him right now.

But he doesn't do that. He hasn't done that.

Worse, he's vetoed every bill that would actually HELP the GI's, fucked over the Veteran's Administration over and over again, and because my family is from Arizona I'll let you in on a little secret. John McCain's senatorial constituent services' SUCK. If you're from Arizona and you actually NEED something, call your Congressman. 'Cause McCain is an asshole. AND incompetent.

For example, he doesn't know the difference between Walter Reed MIDDLE SCHOOL.


Here's a hint...

The MIDDLE SCHOOL is NOT the one where neurosurgeons and neurologists are doing surgery and rehab on troops returned from the war with Traumatic Brain Injury. And also doing research in memory and cognition which might help REALLY FUCKING OLD PEOPLE WITH MASSIVE BRAIN PROBLEMS.

Not that you would remember, Senator McCain. YOU GUNKY.

Video by Americans United.