Friday, September 7, 2007

Vanessa Hudgens Naked

click for high def

Innocent Young Teen Star
Frontally Nude in Sex Scandal

How's that for Google link-whoring headlines? *grins*

Vanessa Hudgens, one of the Disney "High School Musical" stars, has blown it.

Sweet, delightful, one of the good girls of the rising teen stars, Vanessa's nude and semi-nude photos have suddenly been splashed all around the world. (NSFW.)

Lesson? Don't EVER let naked photos of yourself out of your physical control. Not to your boyfriend. Not on the computer the computer repair guy works on. Or the one your dad, brother, girlfriend, children or anyone have access to. Not on your cell phone. Not not not.

I don't care if you love him now and forever. Keep those naked photos to yourself, lock them up behind solid encryption and don't ever ever print them. Or one day you too will find yourself smiling into the lens and out onto the internet for the entire world to see forever. If you're lucky you'll only be naked. If you're unlucky you'll be... performing.

So far Vanessa's done everything right in scandal management. She's confirmed the truth quickly. Taken responsibility for her actions. Apologized to her fans who might feel let down while making clear this was a personal issue. And through her manager issued a not-so-veiled statement about High School Musical 3, daring Disney to make a fuss. Disney quickly said no plans have been settled with the actors, then shut the hell up, leaving the scandal to blow itself out. Which it should. Because the whole Disney customer base already owns HSM 1&2. Two copies. And the sound tracks. Plus the remix. And concert DVD with special Karaoke lessons.

Unless there are photos of Vanessa and a boy scout -- which there aren't. Vanessa really is a good girl. The actual nude is just her standing facing the camera. Very sweet and girl next door. -- HSM 3 is happening with her and Disney knows it. There is simply too much money at stake, her co-star in the movie is her real-life boy-friend and the heat between them is palpable on screen.

HSM is a tent-pole smash home run series for Disney and this little blip won't hurt Christmas sales one bit. Or Vanessa's career which was about to be all Disney all the time.

Vanessa was the It Girl. Now she's the Hot Girl. Sizzling. This will boost HSM sales, especially in the middle of the country where routers are overloading right now with the heat of fan boys going crazy trying to find the naked pictures before they all get taken down. Don't worry boys, she's naked and the photos are staying.

After seeing the photo, I went right out and bought HSM 1. Damn she's HOT. I mean, I hear the musical is pretty good.

Just can't stop humming...

Updated Saturday September 8:

More photos to come?

Unconfirmed reports say "The rumored new shots are of Vanessa in the tub, and another where she has a gold waist chain on and absolutely nothing else." Which would explain why she got out in front of the story so quickly.

Disney has not dumped her, but their statement of support isn't much to go on. Best guess -- they play hardball in negotiations for HSM 3. Her managment should take Disney's offer negotiating just enough for form and then take their time selecting from the many offers no doubt coming Vanessa's way. This will make her career in a good way.

That said, I'm promoting from comments both Sara Robinson's & my personal stories.

Read them and learn. Show this to your kids.

Sara Robinson

Jesse, you must have been listening in when I gave my own daughter that talk a couple years ago. Sitting through that particular edition of Mom's Patented Parental Lectures (TM) was the price of admission for getting her a new camera phone.

You quoted me verbatim, dude. I own the prior art. Where's my royalty check?

Mr. R's mother was briefly married to a professional photographer when she was in her early 20s. (She was widowed at 24, then married Mr. R. Senior.) When she died, we found a boxful of nudes he'd done of her. They were black-and-white and very tasteful -- but still. You don't want to see your mom wandering around Vasquez Rocks in her birthday suit. Really. Poor Mr. R was traumatized for a long while after that.

That experience really brought the whole thing home to me. I use these photos of their grandmother as Exhibit A: "Do you want your grandkids to find anatomically correct photos of you on the Internet in 2100? No? Then..."
Jesse Wendel

I will now make a confession.

Everyone, it's "Jesse's full disclosure time", so pay attention because I'm only saying this once.

*hangs head in shame*

Back during the bad times directly after my 2003 spring suicide attempt, I was out drinking heavily every night, often as much as a bottle of tequila, driving home drunk, getting in bar fights, cutting my arms with razors: I was a huge mess.

This went on a) till all my cash and all my credit cards ran out, meaning I couldn't go out to bars any more at $60 bucks a night, and b) till a friend suggested I get a tattoo instead of slashing myself. That this was a good way to remember the girl who dumped me instead of lines in my arms. And that handled that.


While I was insane (and there were other reasons for being insane which took years to get handled; yes, I'm fine now, thank you, never been better) in those nights I went to bars, I took with me the photographs of her and I -- mostly her, you couldn't see my face, and yes, I mean precisely what you think I mean -- taken in a hotel, in an office, in my bedroom. They were vivid performances of her in action meant for me only. Nothing she'd ever want anyone else seeing. EVER.

I showed them to everyone. Strangers in bars, people I knew, people I met half drunk staggering to my car. "Look at the beautiful bitch who dumped me!" "Ah, yeah. How about you sit here and we call you a cab." "Yeah, sure. But just LOOK! How could she! See how beautiful she is, how much she loves me..." "Sure buddy. Sure."

Six months into my therapy I burned every photograph, destroyed every computer copy. Didn't need that shit lying around.

Just one little problem.

The night before Andy's Bar in Kent went to new ownership, we had a party. All the regulars. BIG party. I was down there with my briefcase which contained everything that matter to me. Including a full set of prints AND a dated CD of the photos in high definition, her name as the Directory Name and printed on the Cover: _____ _____ NUDE PHOTOS.

That night my briefcase was stolen. I was drunk and during the party the case vanished. Including the CD with both the physical prints and the lethal CD. Staggered back down to Andy's the next day; no joy.

I've looked on and off for years, but Google Images still doesn't have them, and neither do the various porn sites. She -- and I, but she's the one who would have been hurt -- seem to have gotten lucky.

When I say I've done a lot of damage over the years and came to know myself late, I'm not kidding. This is as they go, actually a rather mild story. No one ended up getting hurt so far as I know. Just... an open ended possibility for damage to a woman I once loved and now haven't talked to in five years and think about in a remote kind of way maybe every six months. Time heals.

No. I never told her. It would do her no favors. No need for her to spend the rest of her life worrying and she's precisely the kind who would. If it happens, it happens but its been over five years now. Probably not gonna.

Don't give control of your nudes to anyone. Love dies and lovers leave. Trust is violated and in their anger and hurt, people attempt to strike out and get revenge for real and imagined pain and injuries.

Computer repairmen look for your porn and copy it to flash drives right under your nose. Really.

Yes, I know all these people, you trust them. Cut it out. Nude photos are a POWERFUL inducement to violate your trust. Someone somewhere will betray you. So wise the fuck up.

If you have a nude ANYWHERE but an encrypted folder only you have the pass-phrase to, you don't have control. You will lose control. I promise.

Someday, when you least expect it -- and if you have any fame, any public identity at all -- almost certainly when it will damage you most, you're going to see yourself on computer screens EVERYWHERE...screwing, giving head, getting yourself off, coming, stripping for your lover, his cock or her fingers deep inside you, or just as this girl-next-door from Disney was, standing there completely naked.

Like those images?

Now imagine how much worse the reality will be. My words or the actual photos being download by millions of horny fanboys eager to jerk off over your digital image.


Thus endeth the lesson.

(I can't repay the debt prospectively owed my prior gf. Can't repay any of the debts from those years; won't try. But if this WAKES UP one person enough to have them get control of their life back, then the disclosure is worth making.)
Have a story, a different opinion? Lay it on us in comments.