They Lie, Oh They Lie

(1937 KoolAid ad)

They Lie, Oh They Lie

When fire sweeps through an abandoned building that's been used as a crack house and a meth lab, it's a given that the vermin infesting its interior walls will go up in flames, unable to escape.

But if they know the end is coming -- if, say, they have around 20 days to pack their bags, delete their emails, and trade in their roachy exoskeletons for Men's Wearhouse suits -- what might they be doing instead of the jobs they never really performed anyhow?

Well, let's begin by reviewing the ground rules of the current generation of lying liars and the lies which limn their libidos and line their lucre-filled lairs:

(1) Ends justify means.
(2) Make yourself believe the lies you're telling.
(3) Grandiose, for lack of a better term, is good.
(4) Demonstrate integrity by admitting the things you cannot deny anyhow, but claim other apparent realities are "not as bad as it looks".
(5) Stick together, even when you hate each other.

Thus, in the past week, we have the Condi and Laura show, where Dubya's wifemeets are trotting around declaiming that "history" will prove he was not the soulless destroyer of America who shredded the Constitution with his Crawford chainsaw and used the remnants to fuse gasoline-filled bottle bombs lobbed into the Middle East. They are stamping their Prada-shod feet in unison and declaring the press to be bullies.

It's almost entertaining, like the opening segment of a 50's sitcom:

Where Condi adores a minuet
To watch ballet with Soviets
Laura wants to hide inside
With ciggies and her Pearl Drop Vibe
What a wild duet
Still they're Dubya's
They're shackled to Dubya, with no doubt
Choosing to back a loser
Keeps them from coming out

The second act in the Save Junior's Legacy (oh, and our careers, of course) campaign appears to have been unveiled yesterday, with strategic "candid" admissions by former Bush fecal ingestion appurtenances Matthew Dowd and Dan Bartlett that Bush "broke his bond with the public" in his handling of Katrina and was never trusted after that.

Gee, ya think?

These two, and others, were interviewed by Vanity Fair for an oral history of the White House in its February issue, which hits newsstands tomorrow. An AP article on the forthcoming "revelations" also quotes Lawrence Wilkerson as comparing Bush's foreign affairs expertise to that of Sarah Palin, implying he was manipulated from the outset by Cheney. And, in another shocker, David Kuo says leaders of the Religious Right were held in contempt by cynical high-level Bushies, who viewed them as "pains in the butt" which had to be accommodated but did not share their beliefs.

In other news, there were no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.

Folks, this is not the story we are going to settle for, is it? We want the goods, the whole nine yards. We want hearings and handcuffs and moist towelettes afterward to clean their slime from the doorknobs. They're giving us sops, and the next thing coming out of their mouths will be -- guess what?

I'm reminded of the song "Beware, Young Ladies", whose lyrics were taken from an 1847 poem by Longfellow and set to music with sly humor by Blind Alfred Reed in the 1930s. In the 1970s, lesbian-feminist singer/songwriter Alix Dobkin resurrected the song, again with humor, and it became something we political dykes sang with each other about the dishonesty of not only "bold and free" young men but the patriarchal system as a whole:

"They put their hands up to their hearts
They sigh, Oh they sigh,
They say they love no one but you
They lie, Oh they lie"

I say we should caulk every escape hatch, give a whole new generation of young prosecutors some hands-on training, restore America's reputation with live international broadcast of the Bush War Crimes Tribunal, and make use of our poker skills by watching for the tell which means someone in this administration is lying: Their lips are moving.

There's more...

Vanity Fair Calls Michelle "First Lady of Fashion"

Michelle Obama, At home, Photograph: Katrina Wittkamp For Chicago Magazine

Michelle Obama has been anointed the first lady of fashion by Vanity Fair magazine in its annual list of the world’s best-dressed people.-- VF Best Dressed Slideshow

I know it is fluff. But it is still FUN. Michelle makes potential firstladyhood look great. She is modern, actualized, healthy and practical. Someone our young women can look up to. So I am happily celebrating Michelle's ascendancy to First Lady in Vanity Fair.

Keren Eldad, New York fashion manager of the Los Angeles Times, said: “McCain’s style is like the political style of her husband: conservative and outdated. It screams 'safety’ and escapes any nod to change, to risk, or to bravado. She may throw on a tailored leather jacket every once again, but through her pearls and all that hairspray, can we really detect any semblance of inspiration? Of fun?

“Obama, on the other hand, gets it. She IS a modern woman, she has fun with fashion, she embraces life with fury and grace - making apparel choices so varied, that time and again signal this woman never sees anything in life as constant. That’s change. And that is the essence of what fashion is all about”.

Vanity Fair’s style connoisseurs deemed Mrs Obama ready for the crown of the world’s best-dressed woman for her ensemble of a Maria Pinto purple sheath dress, with a black Azzedine Alaïa belt, worn when her husband claimed the Democratic presidential nomination. “She’s our commander in sheath,” the magazine said.

When Mrs Obama appeared on the popular US daytime talk show, The View, wearing a black and white Donna Ricci dress that cost $148 (£74), the dress sold out overnight and made the designer a household name.Telegraph

It is great to see a woman of such sense, style, and smarts being held up as a role model. What a change.

There's more...

There's only ONE Vanity Fair

Valentino celebration. Click for LARGE. photo source unknown.

James Wolcott Doesn't Need Your Money

Vanity Fair covers events ranging from the celebration of the life of fashion icon Valentino, to politics, to young and old Hollywood, to of course, fashion.

VF's James Wolcott -- a good friend of the late Steve Gilliard -- runs a terrific blog, and even mentioned a story we did on Gilly back in December.

Vanity Fair is a wonderful magazine. I subscribe because I like what they deliver.

They don't need my money, but I give it to them because I know without my money they can't pay James Wolcott, they can't pay Annie Leibovitz, they can't do the stuff Condé Nast must do each month to bring me my own copy of VF.

And they're only a monthly. Their writers (mostly) don't write back to you.

Group News Blog operates in real time. Some days more than others obviously (like Hubris' brilliant coverage of the primaries where he was updating three to four times an hour), but every day we bring you a mix: stories, reporting, commentary, opinion, long and short form articles from around the globe.

We're not going to bring you Valentino. (Although it looks like his party was fun.) But four of us are traveling to the Democratic Convention in Denver and we need your support. Not only for the convention. But because you like what we deliver.

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