Thursday, September 3, 2009

Obama Channels Bush

“You Don't Have to Talk About the Parts”

Because they're Icky. Gurl Parts. Moist and Gurrrrly. Ick.

Gays, Women, Privacy, Spying on Us'all... Tell me again; how is it Obama varies from Bush? He even captures people and does renditions to countries that do torture.

But oh yeah... Unlike Bush who hid all that, Obama's people will try really hard to follow up, sometime, eventually, most likely, to see that the bad countries didn't hurt the bad people too badly.

If they did, well... tough shit.

You could bring it up before a Federal Court of Appeals. If it weren't for the Obama Administration arguing that pesky State Secrets Act, precisely the same as Bush.

Yeah, there are some places things are different.

But if you're a girl, gimp, gay or just want some goddamn personal privacy...
The United States holds (G.W.Bush,43,2001-2009;B.H.Obama,44,2009-?):
Fuck Off. We Don't Care About You OR Anything About You Or Your Queer / Fucked-Up Pals. Seriously.

< Obama >
It isn't even that you haven't paid your political dues. You faggots especially... I wouldn't have won California without you, or Hollywood, which means the kids would never have broken early for me, which means I'd never have been totally filling 25,000 person auditoriums in February with over-flow stretching around the auditorium for the money shot, leaving Hillary stuck in a quarter-empty 2,500 person union hall down by the docks with people leaving as soon as she's done while I'm back on stage for a 30 minute rope-line. EVERYONE wants to be with the winner and the gays of California without question fed me the money and the State and the media and Hollywood. When Hollywood comes out for you that's it. You get the kids and that's show-biz. The only question then is, can you ride the tiger or does she buck you? I had the best campaign team in the biz, we'd been preparing for years, and we rode her and won.

And in spite of all that, fuck the gays, fuck the gimps, and fuck the girls. And no privacy for anyone. For reals.

I know, gang. All of y'all expected me to handle your thing right now. *cracks up* Not gunna. Ain't happening. Not till the second term. IF there's a second term. So quit your goddamn bitching, get up off your ass, stop stabbing me in the back and HELP ME ON WHAT MATTERS which is a PUBLIC HEALTH CARE PLAN and THE ECONOMY. Because if BOTH of those doesn't pass in a version that fucking COUNTS, ain't none of us going to be here two and a half years from here (and we'll lose Congress in 14 months, which is what those Fuck Heads are trying to make happen.) If we do get Public Health Care and the Economy, THERE is my Second Term and then I can not only get girls, gimps and gays, we can get the environment for the next 80 years and fix social security. Plus handle hunger and destroy most diseases.

But right now, all there is, ain't nothing else, is Public Health Care and the Economy. All out, nothing held back, at a level that will HANDLE shit for everyone.

So work, dammit, work. Because nothing these fucking white crackers want more than to see me fail (except to see me die.) What... did you think just 'cause the Black man's in the Big House, that was it? We had it made? Fuck... Those cracker's are bringing ASSAULT rifles to my events. It used to be bad during the election. Now, it's a whole new thing...

I can't do this shit alone. I need your help.
< / Obama talking >

K. This is Jesse again.

Obama -- as I wrote back at The News Blog -- received Secret Service protection way-the-fuck back long before any other candidate (excepting Hillary who lives inside the Bubble) because of the many and early no-kidding threats he was receiving. The Crackers hate the idea of a Black man in the White House. Hate, hate, if drives them fucking insane.

And now that Obama is no longer Barack for President but is President Obama, No. 44 with the formal portrait coming and already in the history books -- LM and I were there; it happened, two million people turned out and it was the most wonderful party EVAH. Yes, we were freezing our asses off and don't get me started about how badly the Capital Police and Capital planning folks from the Senate & House screwed things up. Totally typical Senate and House. They had their seats so screw everyone else -- but whatever. The thing is, those goddamn Republican LOSER Crackers just can NOT handle that someone who is not a White Man is POTUS.

Only four, no, five things could make it worse for the Crackers: If POTUS were

  • a woman
  • of color
  • and a big ol' bull-dyke (or even worse, trans)
  • and fat. Really no kidding, huge I'm talking BIG, and no issues with it either,
  • and not just a fat dyke of color, but a seriously practicing Muslim, whose father has multiple wives (and thus, obviously, is not a U.S. citizen -- although he does have a worker's visa as a Physician, which lets him take good American jobs away from good Americans. *laughs*)
My question is, if that were true...

Would the United States Congress as currently constituted even let such a President-elect ...(we're positing say, Case Orange, the 25th Amendment, or a literal act of Jebus, 'cause there's obviously no way the last three of five gets elected in the current U.S.)... does the current Congress let this President-elect I just made up take the Oath, or do they impeach her beforehand with the Senate voting her fat ass out of office the same day there's almost not enough time for the CIA to grab the bitch, slab a black bag over her head and rend her to some torture-lubbing land which will teach all fat Islamic dykes everywhere (U.S. citizens preparing to be sworn in a President especially) to stay the hell away from the U.S.A. 'cause ain't nothing gurls can do against real men.

Gurl parts = Yuck. And that's just the way it is.