I received the following e-mail from a friend, who said it's going around out there. I don't know the source, but I love it.
Dear World --
The United States of America, your quality supplier of ideals of liberty and democracy, would like to apologize for its 2001-2008 service outage.
The technical fault that led to this eight-year service interruption has been located.
Replacement components were ordered Tuesday night, November 4th, and have begun arriving.
Early tests of the new equipment indicate that it is functioning correctly and we expect it to be fully operational by mid-January.
We apologize for any inconvenience caused by the outage and we look forward to resuming full service and hopefully even to improving it in years to come.
Thank you for your patience and understanding,
Wednesday, December 10, 2008